I was sitting in a well loved and enjoyed institution the other day (more commonly known as 'Maccas'), when a young boy sprinted past with his Dad close behind calling out his name. I normally don't take much notice of parents attempting to chase down children clearly fitter than they are, but in this case I had no choice, considering the name used was 'Boston'.
Who calls anyone a city that isn't from Hollywood? A Celtics fan? A drug addict? Is it short for something I don't know about? Bostlivonion, a well known Russian King? (to save you the time in googling, that's a fake king. He's actually Greek.)
This all got me thinking. What if people began naming their kids after video game characters. Famous actors or pieces of fruit be damned, this has to be the way of the future. I'm not just thinking of Mario either, that's too obvious. Say, for examples sake:
Marcus - This one's clear cut. A simple name that I've already met once or twice before, but unbeknownst to those who use it, also a reference to one Gears of War. Just be wary of anyone naming their kid 'Chainsaw' or 'Multikill'.
Link - Zelda would also work, in fact it's considered rather normal by today's standards (there's even a few well known novels that use that name.) But if someone came out with the name Link, that would be killer. Unless he started raiding houses and throwing chickens.
Lara - Okay, so this one is rather obvious again, unless it somehow becomes a boy's name, which would just be confusing with fewer boob joke opportunities.
Peach - A certain Geldof is half way there, but I doubt it was a reference to the Princess of the Mushroom Kingdom.
Ken - Barbie's toy boy (get it?) or Street Fighter brawler? Close call, unless he's born with a headband and red garments.
Duke - Although it might not get the same reaction if he doesn't grow up into a rude talking, sex loving, alien crushing hero, but hey, at least you can start talking about how cool the Nuke is again, what with the 'on again' rebirth of said character. More on that later.
Sonic - Nah. Too 80's.
Bowser - Nah. Too dinosaur centric.
Maybe, if the time ever did come to name a child, something like Alan (Wake) or Chris (of Resident Evil) would be less obvious more still an insiders joke. Truth is, we've become so enthralled with baby names being as unique as possible, it's more a publicity stunt than being thoughtful about the future of these kids. Perhaps we should revert back to traditional names.
Because, dare I say it, I'd hate to have to vote for President Wii any time soon.